Hao Fu, Chenli Chi
Student Affairs Division
Recently, Dr. Ge Gu, lecturer of the oriental forum of the Shanghai municipal party committee propaganda department, crisis intervention expert of Shanghai petition office and distinguished psychologist of Shanghai 2010 world expo, was invited to address the 23th "Xide Lecture" and answer the students' questions with his professional knowledge: How many stages are there in a love relationship? What is the foundation of a love relationship? How can one begin a new relationship after breakup?
According to Ge Gu, there are three stages in a love relationship: passionate stage, rational stage, and role stage. In the first stage, one gradually enters the love status; until one enters the "role stage" and gets used to the other party being one part of his or her life can one officially enters a relationship.
In terms of the foundation of a love relationship, Ge Gu proposed three points: 1. Economic function is a foundation. Everyone needs to work hard for it to get a good relationship. 2. Social function is a restraint. A relationship will surely be affected by others like parents and friends. The handling of these relations is related to the fate of this relationship. 3. Order and rationality are guarantees. Both parties in a relationship need to communicate in a way suitable for themselves to avoid frequent conflicts.
In terms of how to begin a new relationship after breakup, Dr. Gu proposed "three moderately": Feel painful moderately and learn to give up and find something happy or even begin a new relationship; Miss moderately and learn to freeze the most beautiful moment in memory and look forward; Self-hurt moderately and learn to convert the negative emotions to the correct track or the love may become source of evil.
Ge Gu's humorous and passionate style won the applause from all the students present and students also learnt a lot in laughter. Love relationship is a compulsory course in life which should be very beautiful. Hope all the college students can handle the related problems correctly and rationally and enjoy the happiness that love brings.
Translated By Xia Qiao